A Texas organization is trying to find a home for a pint-sized ball of “hatred and darkness.” The Texas Litter Control penned a hilarious biography for the 10-week-old kitten, whose name is Spicy.
The agency writes:
Is your day going great? Just got a raise? S.O. surprised you with a great home cooked meal? Came home from work and your kids cleaned the whole house? Awesome. You must be on cloud nine. Don’t worry, we have the perfect answer to getting your head out of the clouds and your feet back on the ground. Meet Spicy. He is a ten week old, 2 lb ball of hatred and darkness.
And while most rescue groups gush about a homeless pet’s many attributes, the biography for Spicy is quite the opposite. The group writes:
He will do his best to ruin your day, we promise. With Spicy, every day is Monday. At 5am. Waking to the sound of a cat puking somewhere on your carpet. And then stepping in it. He doesn’t embody the darkness, he IS the darkness. He’ll sacrifice you in your sleep and steal your soul. And if cats could laugh, he would definitely laugh about it. Except, he is too angry for laughing. Or playing. Or cuddling. Or really anything you might want to do with an adorable kitten.
And don’t let him fool you, he IS adorable. Almost too cute to stand. Even with his black magic, he doesn’t stand a chance. He will be a happy house cat in no time. Up for a challenge? Then crank up the Black Sabbath and come pick up this prickly fluff ball!!
Are you up for the challenge? Fill out an application here, https://bit.ly/2ROWRYW, if you dare.
Will I still fit on your lap mom?
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